GETTING ALONG WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
OUR RESPONSE TO THE HATEFUL

Diamonds are formed when a lump of coal is subjected to prolonged heat and pressure. God is in the business of shaping His children into precious gems that will sparkle both now and for eternity. He does this the same way as forming a diamond—in this pressure cooker world—and often the source of that heat and pressure is difficult people. People can be so abrasive, but we need to think of them as heavenly sandpaper meant to polish us! Paul the Apostle speaks to the subject of getting along with difficult people in Romans 12:14-21. Here’s what he says,

14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.
15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.
16 Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion.
17 Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men.
18 If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.
19 Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord.
20 Therefore “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.”
21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Paul was one who had learned how to deal with difficult people and so is uniquely qualified to help us.

Consider first, OUR RESPONSE TO THE HATEFUL, “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.” (v.14) All Paul is doing here is echoing our Lord’s teaching from the Sermon on the Mount. There Jesus said, “Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven…” (Matt.5:44-45a).

You see, in my natural state, as a son of Adam, my response to hateful people is to return that hatred. If someone curses me, it is instinctive to curse them back. But, if I am indeed a son of God, my response is to be like that of the Heavenly Father—to be merciful and forgiving, loving and kind. This is how the perfect Son of God lived and I am to become more and more like Him. See Him hanging in agony on the cross, His tormentors lathering Him with spittle and covering Him with curses, as they tread underfoot His precious blood. Hear Him speaking in mercy from the cross concerning these cruel mockers, “Father, forgive them!” This is to be our response to the hateful and by the indwelling of Christ’s life, it can be done!