DIRECTION, DESIRE, AND DISCIPLINE: Household Salvation

Read Acts 16:22-34.

This week we have been looking at parental responsibility to lead their children to Christ, by giving them direction from God’s Word, fueling a desire for Christ, and disciplining them toward repentance. God can save an entire household!  In our text today, we see an example.

The way of salvation was made clear.  In answer to the question, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?” Paul and Silas responded, “Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and you will be saved, you and YOUR HOUSEHOLD” [emphasis added]. God has children, but no grandchildren—father, mother, sons, daughters—each one must personally receive Christ by faith.  It is not a matter of biology, but theology. Yet, the parent is seen to be the key to bringing Christ to the whole family.

The word of salvation was proclaimed. “Then they spoke the word of the Lord to him and TO ALL WHO WERE IN HIS HOUSE” [emphasis added]. Since faith in Christ alone can save us, where can faith be generated in our household?  Paul wrote in Romans 10:17, “So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.”  Think of the Gospel as seed being sown in the soil of our children. As we direct them with the Word to know who Jesus is, hear and see in us joy in Jesus feeding a desire in their hearts for him, and through discipline show them their sinful state and need for repentance, we cultivate their hearts as fertile soil to bear fruit to eternal life.

Their faith was professed through baptism. “And immediately he and ALL HIS FAMILY were baptized” [emphasis added]. What a worship celebration they had in that home that night!  We read, “he rejoiced, having believed in God WITH ALL HIS HOUSEHOLD” [emphasis added]. Daddy was used to direct his entire family to Christ.  That can happen to your family as well!

DIRECTION, DESIRE, AND DISCIPLINE: The Promise to Our Children

Read Acts 2:38-41.

The promise of salvation is offered to all who repent and receive God’s Word.  As Peter proclaimed at Pentecost, “the promise is to you and to your children,” and so our great task as Christian parents is to lead our children to Christ.

We evangelize and disciple them by directing them with truth.  This is why we share the Gospel with them.  Those who were converted at Pentecost are those of whom it is said, “gladly received his word.”

As we give them this direction toward Christ, we pray they will develop a desire for Christ. If you read the entirety of Peter’s sermon that day, you see that it focuses on Jesus.  He is the only Savior. This is how God calls us, and draws our children to Himself through the activity of the Spirit.

The discipline we administer has both a positive and negative dimension to reinforce this truth—a blessing in following Christ and warning of the curse of disobedience. Our children will not be saved until they understand they are sinners who cannot save themselves. They must repent if they would have their sins remitted. Thus, the Holy Spirit will convict them.  Where is the Spirit? He is in the life of the Christian father and mother, and He speaks through them and is seen in their own repentance.

As Peter did, we testify and exhort them, “Be saved from this perverse generation.”  Our prayer is that they will receive the word and as a testimony be baptized and added to the church.

DIRECTION, DESIRE, AND DISCIPLINE: Children and Conversion

Read Mark 10:13-16.

Can children come to Christ?  I believe that they not only can, but they should. Spurgeon said, “I have sometimes met with a deeper spiritual experience in children of ten and twelve—than I have in certain people of fifty and sixty! ... Capacity for believing lies more in the child—than in the man. We grow less rather capable of faith—than more capable of faith. Each year brings the unregenerate farther away from God...” (https://gracegems.org/B/Spurgeon_children.htm).  Every parent and church leader should read what Spurgeon says there.

Children should be directed to Jesus.  In our text, we see “they brought little children to Him, that He might touch them.”  The stodgy old theologians (the disciples) thought it a waste of time, but Jesus “was greatly displeased,” at them and rebuked them.

In directing them to Jesus, we help grow a desire for Jesus. These children were not compelled by force but came freely, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them...” and thus we see in their tender hearts a passion that went beyond parental direction to the youth’s drawing to Christ.  We must show, as adults, the wondrous glory of Jesus—His supreme worth and beauty. Show Jesus as He is to them and they will likely seek Him eagerly!

Of course, they will need discipline in developing their faith. The connection between the world discipline and discipleship should be evident. We must all—irrespective of age—have a childlike faith in coming to Christ. You cannot be saved without such simple trust for Jesus said, “whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.”  That, however, is the starting point and not the ending point. Such genuine faith will become a growing faith.  We disciple them in the principles of “the kingdom of God.”

DIRECTION, DESIRE, AND DISCIPLINE: Will the Circle Be Unbroken?

“For I have known him, in order that he may command his children and his household after him, that they keep the way of the LORD, to do righteousness and justice, that the LORD may bring to Abraham what He has spoken to him.” (Genesis‬ ‭18:19‬)

An old Gospel song poses the question, “Will the circle be unbroken?”  It calls us to reflect on a family circled around a room at some joyous celebration, but also to lament the gathering of a family for a funeral as a loved one has been separated from the living by death.  Ultimately, one hopes for the entire family to be together again in the sweet by and by.

Christian parents who bring children into the world want to see those children with them in the next world. Although we cannot assume responsibility for any individual soul—each person must make their own decision—we can accept accountability for directing them, helping fuel a desire in them, and discipline them toward a relationship with Christ.

We see this in what God says about Abraham.  God knew this man and his heart of faith—that he would point his children heavenward.  Because that love for God would be evident in him, he would stir by example and teaching a desire in his offspring for God. Abraham would discipline his descendants in righteousness and justice so as to minimize the effects of a pagan culture and maximize the opportunity of obedience to God’s will and ways.

Will the circle be unbroken?  Let us seek that for our family with all that is in us!

HUMAN CLAY: Generation to Generation

Read 2 Timothy 1:3-5.

Paul was Timothy’s spiritual “father,” in that he took the young man under his wing, and helped shaped him into the pastor he would become. Yet, that was only possible because the lad had been won to faith through the influence of his mother and grandmother. Paul speaks of, “the genuine faith that is in you, which dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice” (v.5).

In this case, we see the powerful work of the Gospel from generation to generation as it is transmitted down. There was certainly a role played by the preacher in Timothy’s godly service, but the role of a parent in Timothy’s genuine salvation is the matter celebrated here. The truth is, that what happens in the home sets the stage for what happens in the church, and how the message in the church building is reinforced by what is taught in the house is crucial if it is to have enduring impact. It is unlikely that the few hours our ministry has the children under roof at the church house will be sufficient for a child’s spiritual development.  In the best case scenario, there is a partnership between pastors and parents as the church encourages and equips parents in discipling their children.

Even in a single parent home, God can work. The challenges are even greater in that scenario, than when both father and mother are active and engaged.  Some families have both parents present, yet one—often the father—is disengaged from spiritual influence, and may not even be a Christian. Apparently, Timothy was in a single parent home, as the father is not mentioned. There is hope to be found for children in that environment as we note here.

We should also see that a grandparent has a role. Once your children are raised, your work is not done. Likely your children, will have children, and you can continue to reinforce and resource your extended family.

Every Christian—married or not, parent or childless—is to help transmit the Gospel from generation to generation. It is time to embrace our responsibility!

HUMAN CLAY: Nurture and Admonition

Read Ephesians 6:1-4.

Every child is born with self-centeredness and rebellion in their heart. There has only been one virgin to conceive and bear a sinless Child, and thus, we have a job on our hands as parents, grandparents, and mature Christians to help shape that little lump of human clay.

We train children in obedience. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.” (v.1‬). Some have a personality that makes them more readily compliant, yet all to some degree or another manifest disobedience.  It is woven into the fabric of our being.

The training must go beyond actions to attitudes. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise:” (v.2‬). If adults are to be honored, they must demonstrate they are honorable. Kids can sniff out a phony a mile away.

We must show them not only what to do, but why. “‘that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.’” (v.3‬). If all children hear is, “No!” without being taught the positive benefits and protection from evil consequences of obedience to God, it will be counterproductive.

The direction of children toward God and salvation in Christ by discipleship requires both negatives to avoid and positives to apply. “And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.” (v.4‬). Two extremes must be avoided: being loose where we set few boundaries and fail to enforce those we set, or being legalistic and demand our preferences rather than God’s principles. Both are frustrating to a child and end in anger and bitterness. Positive training and corrective confrontation in the Word to lead them to the Lord must be our persistent effort.  We reward good actions and attitudes while disciplining bad ones to open the child’s heart to God.

HUMAN CLAY: Dedication, Direction, and Discipline

Read Proverbs 22:6.

When I worked with clay on the potter’s wheel, there were basic skills used to shape each vessel.  Yet, the clay was not totally identical, and the results likewise differed somewhat. The vessels were not mass-produced as on an assembly line, but were unique creations. Sometimes, the clay contained grit that caused the potential to be marred, and it had to be broken down and begun again.

Similarly, Proverbs 22:6 speaks to the dedication, direction, and discipline required in molding the human clay of our children.

There is dedication.  When Solomon says to “Train up,” the word means to dedicate. This is why we practice a ceremony in our church life called “baby dedication.”  It is a public act of dedicating parents to the task of training their children in God’s ways, and committing those children into God’s hands.

There is direction. It is “a child,” that we are directing. We are pointing them in God’s way and pouring into them God’s truth, if we are helping shape them for His purposes. As pottery clay is best shaped before long exposure to the atmosphere begins to render it rigid, so the word “a child,” points to the strategic time before puberty, when a youngster is most pliable. There is a window of time—all too brief and adults must seize the day!

There is discipline. This requires persistence “in the way he should go.”  Unlike actual clay, human clay is more resistant. It can bow up in our hands and even get up off the potter’s wheel!  Yet, we must discipline ourselves in persistence and discipline the child to overcome resistance. The right amount of pressure is needed to make a useful vessel. Too much or too little and the clay is misshapen.  Part of this discipline is understanding, “the way he should go,” as the Hebrew means, “in his own way,” that each child is a unique creation and requires nuances of difference in training.  A cookie cutter approach won’t work.  We had five kids and I assure you that each was different and responded uniquely to our efforts to train them.

So, the general principle is, “when he is old he will not depart from it.”  I wish this was a promise, but it is a proverb—a wisdom principle. Generally speaking, the child so trained will never get away from what we have poured into them.  Even if there is a period of time when a child wanders, what we have put in them remains in them. The prodigal son left his father’s direction, but his father’s direction never left him. He knew the way back.

This is our duty.  Carpe diem—Latin for “seize the day!”

HUMAN CLAY: Parental Power

Read 1 Kings 22:51-53.

1 Kings ends with several verses that summarize the course of the kingdom of Israel. Did you realize that from its inception when the northern kingdom split from the southern kingdom of Judah, that spiritual decline was the constant course until its demise? The reign of each king was an unbroken chain of wickedness, until God judged them.  The southern kingdom of Judah was much the same, except that occasionally a king would break the pattern and a spiritual awakening would return the people briefly back to God.  Yet, final decline would follow and Judah would fall as well.

It is an illustration of parental power. Can you imagine having the notorious Ahab and Jezebel as your father and mother?  That was the home prince Ahaziah was raised in. No wonder he became a wicked king after Ahab and Jezebel’s deaths. “He did evil in the sight of the LORD, and walked in the way of his father and in the way of his mother and in the way of Jeroboam the son of Nebat, who had made Israel sin; for he served Baal and worshiped him, and provoked the LORD God of Israel to anger, according to all that his father had done.” (v.52-53‬).

The reality is that each of those wicked kings had occasion to repent.  They chose to rebel against God. Parental power is not a guarantor the children will become as their parents, yet it is such a strong influence. Physically, you can often see someone who walks like their dad—and I have observed this spiritually, as well. We dare not minimize the impact of what parents say to their children in their messages. Yet, we must maximize the influence from what parents show to their children in their model. They will often become what we are more than what we say.

We will not be perfect parents. Only God the Father is. Yet, His grace is available to empower us. His Word is accessible to equip us. Pray and seek to practice what you preach—including repentance when you fail. Our walk with God is the most important thing about our life this side of eternity, and it will be the greatest influence on our children and generations to come.

HUMAN CLAY: Shaping Children

Read Numbers 14:18.

When I studied art, I was given a lump of clay. It was placed on the potter’s wheel, water was used to moisten it, and then the proper pressure from my hands molded it, as the wheel turned. The beauty and usefulness of the vessel depended on my shaping of it.

In a sense, our children are human clay. Parents have a tremendous power to shape young lives while they are still pliable. Wait too long and the clay hardens and is resistant. Of course, the analogy breaks down, if pressed too far. Unlike a lump of clay on the wheel, our children have a mind of their own, and the sin within them can make them resist our influence. Still, that doesn’t alter that adults have great power in shaping young lives.

In the text, we see this declared. On the one hand, here are those generations that find forgiveness and God’s blessing which in large measure is because parents, grandparents, and other mature Christians have influenced them through their example and teaching to seek after God. On the other hand, there is the dire warning of one generation after another experiencing the judgment of God because they are rebels against His principles. If we fail in molding the next generation for good, then the cycle of failure is passed on.

It is a sobering responsibility. We need to fall on our faces before God, and ask Him for mercy and forgiveness for our own failings and plead for grace to enable us to shape the next generation for Christ.

FIGHTING FAMILIES: The Weapons of our Warfare

Read 2 Corinthians 10:3-6.

What Paul says of Christian warfare in general can be applied to the battle for our family in particular. That Satan and his forces are arrayed against Christian homes and especially preventing the transmission of truth to the next generation is indisputable. Yet, it is a conflict that we can and must win. God has given us weapons and the Apostle describes them here.

These are spiritual weapons. We often think of media, atheists, abortionists, homosexual activists, and so forth as being the enemy, when they are actually those enslaved by the enemy. It is the dark, demonic forces at work behind the material world that we war against.

Our weapons are superior weapons. Satan is stronger than we are, yet he is no match for God!  Not even close!

These weapons can pull down strongholds. Just like the walls around the stronghold of Jericho fell—not by military strategy, but God’s power—so God can free our children’s minds and hearts from satanic strongholds that the world erects.

Our weapons can cast down arguments. Truth is mightier than error.  The lies told to our children can be overcome.

Our weapons can bring down the arrogant deceptions that rail against God, deny His existence, and seek to undermine our children’s faith.  The smug secularist is not as smart as the simple saint who knows the Word of God.

Ultimately, we can capture the thoughts of our children, and lead them into obedience to Christ.  Call it, “brainwashing,” if you will—the reality is that one side or the other is going to win the battle for young minds.

Not only positive instruction, but corrective discipline is needed. Young people must be taught the benefits of obedience to God, but also the pain of disobedience. How we direct them and discipline them is of critical importance.

Take up those weapons.  This is war!  It is winnable. The souls of the next generation are at stake.

FIGHTING FAMILIES: The Field of Battle

Read Ephesians 6:10-18.

The war we are in for the souls of our children is real. Just because we do not use bullets and bombs, but Bibles, makes it no less deadly.  In fact, more than physical peril, their eternal destination is at stake.

Do we feel overwhelmed by this assignment?  Good, because we are overmatched. That is why Paul tells us we must stand in God’s power, for ours is insufficient. Yet, with God all things are possible. If Noah could get all his family on the ark in an age worse than ours, then we can get our children to heaven.

Each day we must put our armor on. The Apostle describes that armor. Fathers and mothers, grandparents, and church members must prepare for battle. This is not a game.

The weapon for offense is the sword of the Spirit—the Word of God. We must turn to Scripture, devote ourselves to its study, and instruct our children. Keep the sword sharp!

The field of battle, once we are dressed, is in the place of prayer. That is where the real conflict occurs. This is, after all, a spiritual war. Bible teacher, A.W. Pink said, “[The] most important duty, respecting both the temporal and spiritual good of your children, is fervent supplication to God for them. Without this all the rest will be ineffectual. Means are unavailing unless the Lord blesses them. The Throne of Grace is to be earnestly implored that your efforts to bring up your children for God may be crowned with success.”

Now, get on your knees and fight!

FIGHTING FAMILIES: Spiritual Casualties

Read 1 Kings 11:1-12:20.

What one generation permits in moderation, the next generation excuses in excess. Wars are not usually lost in a single battle, but in a series of setbacks. The story of David’s family is an illustration of this sad reality.  It is a story of spiritual casualties on the battlefield of life.

David was able to bring down a giant with a slingshot, but did not conquer lust that rose in his heart. He was a man after God’s own heart—a true champion—yet, as he aged he let his guard down, and his moral failure would have the gravest impact on his children.  One son, Amnon, would rape his sister, Tamar. Then, another son, Absalom, would kill Amnon. Absalom would eventually lead a rebellion against his father, which would end in the young man’s death in battle.

David’s son, Solomon would ascend to the throne. In many ways, Solomon’s reign was marked by success.  Yet, as his father, in the latter stages of his rule, he did not rule over his passions, married many pagan women, who influenced him to turn to idols (1 Kings 11:1-43).

David’s grandson, Rehoboam would be the next king. From the outset, he will demonstrate his folly (1 Kings 12:1-20). Rather than listen to the godly counsel of his elders, he heeds the foolishness of his peers. The result is that the kingdom is divided—civil war ensues—and the reign of Rehoboam brings further spiritual decline to the nation.

“Now Judah did evil in the sight of the LORD, and they provoked Him to jealousy with their sins which they committed, more than all that their fathers had done. For they also built for themselves high places, sacred pillars, and wooden images on every high hill and under every green tree. And there were also perverted persons in the land. They did according to all the abominations of the nations which the LORD had cast out before the children of Israel.” (1 Kings‬ ‭14:22-24‬).

The outcome of a battle can turn on seemingly small decisions. In the fight for our family, we cannot let our guard down for a moment. Our children and grandchildren will be the spiritual casualties.

FIGHTING FAMILIES: The Battle for the Next Generation

Read Judges 2:7-12.

You need to be a fighting family. I’m not advocating that we fight with each other, but fight for one another. If we do not face the fact that we live in a world that is hostile to faith, then we will lose the war for our children’s souls. This is the battle for the next generation.

It is one that Israel lost. In our text today, we note how Joshua led the people of his day to live for God. “So the people served the LORD all the days of Joshua, and all the days of the elders who outlived Joshua, who had seen all the great works of the LORD which He had done for Israel.” (v.7‬). They not only knew about God, but they had experienced Him.  Yet, they failed to lead the next generation into that same reality. “When all that generation had been gathered to their fathers, another generation arose after them who did not know the LORD nor the work which He had done for Israel.” (v.10‬)

Joshua’s generation had been fighters—they had warred against the pagan culture. The next generation practiced compromise and surrendered to the heathen environment. “Then the children of Israel did evil in the sight of the LORD, and served the Baals; and they forsook the LORD God of their fathers, who had brought them out of the land of Egypt; and they followed other gods from among the gods of the people who were all around them, and they bowed down to them; and they provoked the LORD to anger.” (v.11-12‬).

This is the great challenge of our day. Make a commitment to be a fighting family. The eternal destiny of your children is at stake!

A FRESH START: Turning the Hearts of Children to Jesus

Read John 1:19-34

John the Baptist bridged the gap between the close of the Old Covenant and the coming of the New Covenant—the last of the Old Testament prophets and the herald of a new day in Christ. In how he dressed, and the message he shared—some thought he was Elijah returned to earth. He denied it (John 1:21). Literally, he was not. Yet, figuratively, he was (Matt.11:7-15; John 1:23). The end of the Old Testament prophesies of John’s coming, “Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet Before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the LORD. And he will turn The hearts of the fathers to the children, And the hearts of the children to their fathers, Lest I come and strike the earth with a curse.” (Malachi‬ ‭4:5-6‬)

Note, especially the promise of how God would work through John to bring revival to the home. The survival of the nation is dependent on the revival of the church, and the revival of the church is dependent on the revival of the family. It is in the home where the greatest work of God needs to be done and can be done—foundational to the church and state.

John the Baptist provides two essentials for how parents can lead their children to God.

A visual—his life was different.  The people of his day had never seen anyone quite like John—a life that demanded an explanation (John 1:19-23).  We show our kids what the Christian life is like. If we are to turn the hearts of the children toward God, then we must display a heart for God ourselves.

A voice—his testimony was direct. Jesus was John’s magnificent obsession (John 1:24-34). We share with our kids who Christ is.  Parents are not charged to merely make little moral creatures who are well-behaved, but to point them to the need of a Savior because of their sinfulness and create in them a desire for Him in how we describe His glory and majesty. We give them a heart for Jesus as we share the Gospel.

Parents, grandparents, children’s workers—all of us—let us do likewise. We have been losing our children to the world; may God help us lead them to the Lord!  It’s time for a fresh start. John the Baptist shows us how.

A FRESH START: Life Lessons

Read Proverbs 4:10-27.

The home is the classroom of life and parents have been designated by God as the instructors. Grandparents are to reinforce those truths and the church is to offer encouragement, enablement of parents through equipping and resourcing, then, supplement the discipleship process. Solomon shows three targets of this instruction.

Show the PATH TO TAKE.  “Hear, my son, and receive my sayings, And the years of your life will be many. I have taught you in the way of wisdom; I have led you in right paths. ... Do not enter the path of the wicked, And do not walk in the way of evil.” (v.10-11, 14‬). Our children must be steered in the right direction. We must show them the way of wisdom in the pattern we show and the principles we share. It is vital that we do more than tell them what to do, but explain why they ought, so when they must make decisions later, they will know the path to take.

Explain the PEOPLE TO AVOID.  “Do not enter the path of the wicked, And do not walk in the way of evil.” (v.14‬). The children’s peers will have a tremendous influence on them.  We must help them identify the characteristics of people who will bring destructive influences into their lives. Our more developed spiritual radar needs to help us keep them safe from such.  There is to be careful guidance to help them care for sinners in loving them without conforming to sin by joining them.

Reinforce the PURPOSE TO EMBRACE. “Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life.” (v.23‬). More than the conduct of a child, their heart is what we are to aim for. If we help them embrace God’s purposes in their heart, then they will choose God’s path for their feet. Failing to win their heart means we will lead them to be: moral hypocrites, who outwardly are religious, yet inwardly are self-righteous or eventual rebels, that as soon as they escape parental supervision run in the direction of their sinful heart.

“Ponder the path of your feet, And let all your ways be established. Do not turn to the right or the left; Remove your foot from evil.” (v.26-27‬). Are we hitting the target?

ALL IN THE FAMILY

Proverbs 17:1-2, 6, 14, 21, 25

Solomon shares with us many principles for family life throughout the Proverbs, and in this chapter there are several featured.  Sadly, he failed to abide by these truths in many ways, showing that it is easier to say it than to do it.  Yet, if we will apply these axioms, then family life can be the closest thing to heaven on earth.  Failing in the family will bring the closest thing to hell on earth.

1.  HARMONY IN THE HOME IS HEAVENLY. “Better is a dry morsel with quietness, Than a house full of feasting with strife. The beginning of strife is like releasing water; Therefore stop contention before a quarrel starts.” (v.1, 14). You can live in a palace, but without peace in that home, you are impoverished. The presence of strife ruins the appetite. The best place to stop an argument is before it starts. A heart full of love, the spirit of forgiveness, humility, and self-control, exercised by one another, brings such heavenly harmony.  Let us pray for the Holy Spirit to descend as the Dove of Peace on our household. It isn’t my way or my spouse’s way, but God’s way that we ought to seek.

2. GROUNDING CHILDREN IN THE TRUTH BRINGS BLESSING.  “A wise servant will rule over a son who causes shame, And will share an inheritance among the brothers.  He who begets a scoffer does so to his sorrow, And the father of a fool has no joy.  A foolish son is a grief to his father, And bitterness to her who bore him.” (v.2, 21, 25). Here we see the opposite.  There is shame and sorrow when children are not grounded in the Word of God.  Therefore, let us seek to “bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord” (Eph.6:4). Solomon knew what he was talking about. His son Rehoboam failed to receive these truths. 

3.  HAVING CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN CAN BE GLORIOUS. “Children’s children are the crown of old men, And the glory of children is their father.” (v.6 NKJV). When children can glory in their father—watching him walk with God, love their mother, and lead them in truth, they may grow up to follow in his footsteps and enable him to know the glory of grandchildren.  Our children’s children can be such a source of delight!  As the old fellow said, “If I had known grandkids would be so much fun, I would have had them first!”

May the Lord help us build our home according to the Bible blueprint!  Let us study, submit to, and share these Scriptural principles in our family.

SMART OR STUPID? GLADNESS OR GRIEF?

“The proverbs of Solomon: A wise son makes a glad father, But a foolish son is the grief of his mother.” (‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭10:1‬ ‭NKJV‬‬)

Our children have the capacity to bring us great gladness or giant grief.  They are a source of happiness but can also be a source of heartbreak. The determining factor according to Solomon is whether the sons are smart or stupid.  By that, I don’t mean intellectual aptitude and educational achievement.  There are some morons with PHD’s and some geniuses who are post hole diggers. There is certainly nothing wrong with “book learning,” and mental acuity is wonderful.  Develop your mind as far as you are able for the glory of God who created you with a brain.  Use your head for something other than a hat rack!

Solomon, however, is speaking of the wisdom that comes from the Word—of spiritual capacity rooted in knowing God.  Remember that, “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding” (Prov. 9:10). So, wisdom is not so much about our mental capacity as our moral character. What we are spiritually affects every dimension of our life—our mind, will, and emotions are directed according to the Scriptures.

As parents are we discipling our children to know the Lord?  Are we helping them grow in their connection with the eternal One?  Such sons and daughters will gladden us.  Instead, we may focus on their classroom grades and ballfield trophies—preparing them for success in the world—but, if we fail to impart wisdom, leading them to be smart in the things of God, we will have stupid kids who will grieve us.  They may know many foreign languages, speaking them fluently, but not be conversant with eternity. They may get high marks in trigonometry, but flunk theology. They may make a fortune in business, but be spiritually bankrupt and morally impoverished.

Let’s get busy on teaching them Book work—the Good Book, that is.

LIVING LETTERS

And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.  (Ephesians 6:4)

“Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see” (John W. Whitehead).  That being true, the question is, “What kind of living letter are you writing?”  Too many dip their parental pen in poison and write a deadly message on their child’s heart.  These children will grow up to be turned loose on society to spread evil like a plague.  Even Christian parents often fail to write the Word of God upon their kids’ hearts.  Yet, we have the potential under God to turn this around and send out living letters of testimony to the grace and power of Christ to future generations.  Paul offers four requirements in Eph.6:1-4 for being effective parents.

There needs to be DEMONSTRATION, “you fathers…” (6:4a).  It is not that mothers do not play a significant role in the spiritual development of their children, for they certainly do.  Still, God has placed men as the leaders of their home.  Our children will not become what we say, but what they see!  They had rather see a sermon than hear one.  What do our children need to see in us?

If you want your children to honor you, then be an honorable parent—not a hypocritical one.  Prov.17:6 says, “Parents are the pride of their children.”  Little eyes are watching our every move.  A person’s image of the Heavenly Father is often patterned after the image they have of their human father.

Proper parenting demands DEVOTION, “bring them up…” (6:4b).  This requires a commitment to them—to making our sons and daughters a priority.  In the Old Testament a father would give a blessing to their kids.  The father would place his hands on them and speak to them words of blessing.  Have you given the blessing?

The blessing was communicated by proper touch.  Kids need our touch.  They need lots of hugs.  They grow up secure when they receive this affection and they know how to express love to others.  A survey of teens from Christian homes found 79% felt unloved!  God forbid!

We also bless with positive talk.  We communicate by the tone of our voice whether our children are special or a nuisance.  Critical, negative parents undermine their child’s potential and raise kids that either become perfectionists pursuing an elusive goal of pleasing their parents or we embitter them and they despair.

Loving parents exercise proper DISCIPLINE, “training…” (6:4b).  We must reward good behavior.  When they get it right we must let them know.  When you are rewarded on your job with a raise or promotion it inspires you to work harder.  That principle is just as valid with our kids.  There will also be correction that should be swift, direct, and proportionate.  Our Father in Heaven disciplines us in love and we are to follow His example.

Good parents give DIRECTION, “admonition…” (6:4b).  The most important thing you can teach them is, “Jesus loves me this I know for the Bible tells me so.”  We don’t want to bring children into the world if we aren’t going to take them to heaven with us.  There is a power in the Word of God to direct them.  Nature abhors a vacuum.  The Word will fill their minds with Divine direction, or the world will with demonic deception.

Let every adult believer call upon God to help us impact this younger generation for Christ!  This is urgent and essential business!

STUMBLING BLOCKS OR STEPPING-STONES

Woe to the world because of offenses!  For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes!  (Matthew 18:7)

Are you a stepping-stone or a stumbling block?  God wants His people to be a bridge to help people to reach Him, rather than a barrier to hinder them from coming.  We are a daily advertisement for Christ.  Is the ad appealing?  We can be humble or haughty, holy or hypocritical, helpful or hateful—we will seldom be neutral.  We will be a positive or negative influence.  Jesus presents that sobering reality in Matthew 18.

Our attitude will make a difference in whether we are a stumbling block or stepping-stone.  In verses 1-7, Jesus is speaking about the humble spirit of a small child, as contrasted to the arrogant bully who runs roughshod over people.  We are being like the Savior when we are humble (Phil.2:3-8), but like Satan when we are haughty (Isa.14:12-15).  What is the humility of a child?  They do not worry about appearance.  They are genuine instead of putting up a front.  Children want to help.  They have the soul of a servant.  Then things get messed up.  Ego grows with our girth and physical stature demands social status to match.  Jesus called upon his grownups to become childlike.  Receive little children (v.5), rather than reject them.  Go to work in the church nursery—that is the factory for producing humble servants!  Change some diapers if you doubt it!  The most solemn warning is given to those who cause children to stumble (v.6-7).

We will be stumbling blocks rather than stepping-stones if we allow sinful passions to dominate our deeds, direction, and desires (v.8-14).  Woven into the very fabric of our soul are these dark threads of lust—wicked appetites that demand feeding.  Our world enshrines them, we enthrone them—only to find we become enslaved by them.  Chains of corruption—fetters of filth—wrap themselves around the heart and drag men and women down into hell.  Jesus said that radical surgery was demanded for this heart problem.  Extreme measures must be taken to overcome evil.  He was speaking metaphorically.  Mutilation will not produce holiness.  What Jesus is calling for is repentance—turning from sin by taking the sinner to the cross and turning to Christ by receiving His new life by faith.  The ultimate issue is getting a new heart—and that is salvation (v.8-10).  How many sinners spurn salvation because they have seen preachers and church members living immoral lives while calling others to new life—what a pious fraud!  God is all about seeking lost sheep (v.11-14).  We need a passion for souls, rather than sin.

Bitterness will be another barrier to people receiving our witness (v.15-35).  Grudges grind ugliness into our faces and the corrosive speech that we utter from an unforgiving heart is repulsive.  We dare not herald grace while holding grudges.  A winsome witness, who wins someone to Christ, has experienced the joy of forgiveness, and wants others to know it!  This is the church’s work (v.15-20).  The harsh face of the legalist and haughty tones of their criticism never draw people to Christ.  Bitterness makes you ugly.  It makes your breath reek with condemnation and your eyes bulge with hate.  If we want forgiveness then we must be willing to extend it (v.21-35).  Bitterness erect barriers and grace builds bridges.  Are we stumbling blocks or stepping-stones?

A NOTE TO REMIND YOU

“Therefore you shall love the LORD your God, and keep His charge, His statutes, His judgments, and His commandments always.”  (Deuteronomy 11:1)

I can be so forgetful.  When I make an appointment, I put it into my phone with all kinds of alarms to go off—along with the details of who, where, when, why, and the like.  Just yesterday, I needed to go to the store for three things and could only recall one of them.  It later dawned on me what it was, so, lest I forget again, I took a sharpie and all I had in the car to write on—a napkin—and made myself a note lest I forget once more!  An old fellow was asked, “Do you believe in the hereafter?”  His reply was, “Oh, yes!  I walk to the other end of the house to get something and by the time I get there, forget and ask, ‘What am I here after?’”

Deuteronomy 11 is a spiritual reminder note from God.  There is not any new material—the message was given before and is repeated.  The reemphasis is for two main reasons.  It was given to a generation that came out of Egypt as children.  They have meandered through the wilderness for forty years, until all their parents have died—Moses is soon to depart.  Only two of that older generation will survive to enter Canaan with them—Joshua and Caleb—because of their faith and obedience.  Therefore, the first reason for the repetition is to underscore that their fathers and mothers failure to follow the Lord’s instructions must not be the path they take.  The second reason for the repetition is—people have thick skulls!  It takes a lot to drum the truth into our noggin.  We forget—and we dare not!  Really, the Bible does not say many different things—it just repeats the same truths repeatedly.

The congregation addressed has reached maturity.  They have seen the mighty hand of God at work.  They are called to remember, and then to relay that baton of truth to their children.  Each generation must be faithful to transfer their testimony to the next one.  Do not drop the baton or the team will lose the spiritual race!  We have the privilege and responsibility of preparing the children and youth of today for their leg of the race tomorrow—and then as we complete ours, to cheer them on as they take off down the track.  I cannot understand why it is always such a chore to get church folk to work in the nursery, teach youth Sunday School, or help with Vacation Bible School.  God takes it seriously and we should!

They would come into a God-blessed land.  If Israel would be obedient, they would continue to experience those blessings, but, they are warned turning away into sin would bring God’s displeasure and with it, His discipline.  My generation grew up in such a place called America, but we have not taught our children well, and the results are what seems to be impending judgment—if we are not in it already.  There is no enemy within our gates or outside our borders, we would need to fear if we would fear God.  Failing in that, we have every right to expect the blessing to turn to cursing, and from being the victor to become the vanquished.  Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it.  What is God saying to you today—again?  This is a note to remind you.