LOVE OR LUST?

“Drink water from your own cistern, And running water from your own well. Should your fountains be dispersed abroad, Streams of water in the streets? Let them be only your own, And not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, And rejoice with the wife of your youth.” (Proverbs 5:15-18)

Sex is not sinful.  God invented it.  He wired us up as sexual beings—male and female.  Indeed, it is for the procreation of the species, but more than that—it is for the pleasure of the spouses.  There is a binding power that goes beyond the physical—extending into the spiritual and emotional realm, when the two become one flesh.

The problem is that this powerful force has become perverted through sin.  What many call, “making love,” is actually fulfilling lust.  It is not about giving to the other person, but getting from them.  Coming together as husband and wife in the commitment of marriage is a wondrous thing, but to do so outside of that covenant relationship is a wicked thing.  The former is delightful and the latter destructive. God’s commandments are not meant to kill our joy, but to kindle it with a holy fire.

Think of it this way.  A fire contained inside a wood stove will heat your house all winter, but let that fire escape confinement and it will burn your house down.  That is the way sexual expression is.  In the arms of your mate, it will keep the relationship warm, but in the arms of an immoral person, it will consume you.  You can look at a fence in two ways.  You can view it as a barrier to keep you from getting something you want, or you can see it as a protection to guard something from harm.  The Lord took sex and put it behind a fence called marriage, and he did it to preserve our joy—not to prevent it.

Adults, let us model faithfulness to marriage.  Let us teach our children  and grandchildren the truth that the world mocks.  Young reader, heed this message.  You will be glad you did.  If we have failed, let us repent and renew our commitment to God’s wisdom.

WHAT’S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT?

You may recall Tina Turner’s pop music hit from years ago that posed this question.  As we approach Valentine’s Day—a time designated to celebrate love—it is an uncomfortable conversation we need to have.  Turner’s song was very cynical—conveying that the relationship of man and women is merely physical in nature and love is just a romantic ideal— an antiquated notion.  Many people look at marriage and love that way—even among those who claim Christianity as their faith.

The numbers are staggering.  The shocking statistics from the Federal Government Centers for Disease Control finds 60% of women and 67% of men believe, “Living together before marriage may help prevent divorce.”  The numbers of women and men who agreed, “A young couple should not live together unless they are married has been decreasing from 34.7% in 2002 to 30.8% in 2006-2010, down to 28% in 2013.  I would like to think the attitudes among those in Bible-believing churches would be the reverse of this, but from what I hear and see, those convictions may be eroding.  With each passing year, the culture more than the Scripture seems to direct our morals.

Times have changed—but, God has not.  His standards have not.

Sex isn’t dirty.  It is a precious gift of God who made us sexual beings and designed it for procreation—and also pleasure—within the bounds of holy matrimony. God wasn’t trying to rob us of fun, but rather His commands are for our benefit so that we may experience ultimate joy.  The fact is “trying it out” by cohabitation does not help prevent divorce, but studies show that the guilt and shame—the self-centered baggage—carried into marriage increases the odds the marriage will fail.  A fire in the fireplace can heat your home on a cold winter’s night.  Let that fire escape its barrier and it will burn the house down!

What’s love got to do with it?  Everything—true love, God’s way.  Much of what is described as love today is lust.

Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge. (Hebrews 13:4 NKJV)  A sobering truth, isn’t it?  Because I love you, I must warn you.

Thankfully, there is grace and mercy available from the Lord.  We can turn from our sin and seek Him.  His way is always best.  May God use His Word to shape us and His Spirit to convict us in this area. I can go astray in this sexually explicit society.  If I don’t stay close to God and close to my spouse, Satan can find an easy target.  If David, a man after God’s own heart, could yield to temptation, any of us can.  Pray for one another.  Pray for marriages.  Pray for purity.  As we come to Valentine’s Day, may we celebrate true love!

THE HIGH COST OF LOW LIVING

But the thing that David had done displeased the LORD.  (2 Samuel 11:27b) 

I don’t know who first said it, but it is absolutely right: “Sin will take you farther than you want to go, keep you longer than you want to stay, and cost you more than you want to pay.”  There is a high cost to low living.  David found that out the hard way.  The sorrowful, sordid story unfolds in 2 Samuel 11-12. 

The moral collapse of the man of God begins with a seemingly small evasion of duty (11:1).  At a time when David should have been with his troops staying on the battlefield, he is strolling on the balcony.  An idle mind is the Devil’s workshop.  It may seem a little thing at first to become slack in worship attendance, neglectful of a daily devotional time, or step back from Christian service.  But, nature abhors a vacuum—and if your mind is not filled with God’s Word, Satan will fill it with carnal thoughts; if our calendar is not filled with wholesome activity, it will become filled with worldly pursuits.  It is only a matter of time. 

We discover David up at night, wandering the palace balcony, where the lion of lust waits to pounce on him (11:2-5).  If a man rises early, meets God in prayer and the Word, his spiritual defenses will be strengthened.  Staying up late and sleeping in sets a pattern which paves the way for exposure to all manner of evil—seldom does any good activity happen after midnight.  How many are swept up into sin—caught up in porn, lured into illicit texting, even swept up into an adulterer’s arms because they were up at night with eyes open that should have been closed in sleep—in anticipation of the next day and getting up and gazing upon the Word of God. 

The sin David committed was bad enough, but the sin he covered was worse (11:6-27).  Bathsheba becomes pregnant.  Her husband, Uriah, will become a casualty of David’s sexual conquest.  Uriah was a Hittite—one of the pagan people that Israel had conquered when they took Canaan.  Yet, his character outshines one of the chosen people in this story.  David, doubtless, never intended for things to go as far as they did, but give the Devil an inch and he will take a mile.  Even Joab is drawn into the conspiracy that brought down an innocent man.  David had become an adulterer, liar, and now a murderer! 

Numbers 32:23 warns, “be sure your sin will find you out.”  The secret sin on earth is a public scandal in heaven.  David will be exposed.  When God sends his prophet to confront the king, he shares a story that will stir a former shepherd’s heart (12:1-6).  We are often quick to judge in another what lurks in our own soul.  Nathan points his bony finger at David—like an arrow hitting his heart comes the pronouncement, “You are the man!” (v.7)  To David’s credit, he is repentant.  God will forgive, yet by his own lips, David had pronounced his own punishment: “fourfold,” (v.6).  The baby Bathsheba will birth will become sick and die—that’s one.  After Amnon, David’s son, rapes his sister, her brother, Absalom will kill Amnon—that’s two.  Absalom will lead a rebellion against David, only to be eventually slain by Joab—that’s three.  Later, Solomon will execute another of David’s sons, Adonijah—that’s four.  We sow evil seed and hope for a crop failure, but God is not mocked (Gal.6:7-8).  

STUMBLING BLOCKS OR STEPPING-STONES

Woe to the world because of offenses!  For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes!  (Matthew 18:7)

Are you a stepping-stone or a stumbling block?  God wants His people to be a bridge to help people to reach Him, rather than a barrier to hinder them from coming.  We are a daily advertisement for Christ.  Is the ad appealing?  We can be humble or haughty, holy or hypocritical, helpful or hateful—we will seldom be neutral.  We will be a positive or negative influence.  Jesus presents that sobering reality in Matthew 18.

Our attitude will make a difference in whether we are a stumbling block or stepping-stone.  In verses 1-7, Jesus is speaking about the humble spirit of a small child, as contrasted to the arrogant bully who runs roughshod over people.  We are being like the Savior when we are humble (Phil.2:3-8), but like Satan when we are haughty (Isa.14:12-15).  What is the humility of a child?  They do not worry about appearance.  They are genuine instead of putting up a front.  Children want to help.  They have the soul of a servant.  Then things get messed up.  Ego grows with our girth and physical stature demands social status to match.  Jesus called upon his grownups to become childlike.  Receive little children (v.5), rather than reject them.  Go to work in the church nursery—that is the factory for producing humble servants!  Change some diapers if you doubt it!  The most solemn warning is given to those who cause children to stumble (v.6-7).

We will be stumbling blocks rather than stepping-stones if we allow sinful passions to dominate our deeds, direction, and desires (v.8-14).  Woven into the very fabric of our soul are these dark threads of lust—wicked appetites that demand feeding.  Our world enshrines them, we enthrone them—only to find we become enslaved by them.  Chains of corruption—fetters of filth—wrap themselves around the heart and drag men and women down into hell.  Jesus said that radical surgery was demanded for this heart problem.  Extreme measures must be taken to overcome evil.  He was speaking metaphorically.  Mutilation will not produce holiness.  What Jesus is calling for is repentance—turning from sin by taking the sinner to the cross and turning to Christ by receiving His new life by faith.  The ultimate issue is getting a new heart—and that is salvation (v.8-10).  How many sinners spurn salvation because they have seen preachers and church members living immoral lives while calling others to new life—what a pious fraud!  God is all about seeking lost sheep (v.11-14).  We need a passion for souls, rather than sin.

Bitterness will be another barrier to people receiving our witness (v.15-35).  Grudges grind ugliness into our faces and the corrosive speech that we utter from an unforgiving heart is repulsive.  We dare not herald grace while holding grudges.  A winsome witness, who wins someone to Christ, has experienced the joy of forgiveness, and wants others to know it!  This is the church’s work (v.15-20).  The harsh face of the legalist and haughty tones of their criticism never draw people to Christ.  Bitterness makes you ugly.  It makes your breath reek with condemnation and your eyes bulge with hate.  If we want forgiveness then we must be willing to extend it (v.21-35).  Bitterness erect barriers and grace builds bridges.  Are we stumbling blocks or stepping-stones?